Staring again (Sorry for grammatical mistakes)

Just some private notes:
24th Aug 2009 -
Yesterday I watched "Hum Tum" - a hindi feature film. I don't remember how may times I watched that film. Some of the scenes are very close to mine. Everytime it gives me some kind of pain. rememberence of Someone very close to heart. I had a painting in my mind which I'll be doing sometime during this week.
1st Sept 2009 -Over this weekend I watched 2 movies which were you can say disturbed me a lot. It maid me to travel to the past. Just to put down my feelings I painted the first one. Second one is these in my mind.
3rd Sept 2009 -
Just thought about the bindings that I currently have. I think that am being a slave. Slave of money. Every time when I feel that am out of this self made slavery, I realized that am going deep inside of it. May be no return back. I just want to be free. free from all these.
9th Sept 2009 -
Quite often I'm dreaming prophetically.Am noticing some changes in my thinking process. Am not sure whether it is for good.Yesterday I was thinking about individual freedom. Freedom from all earthly bonds. Is that possible?? Am confused now. Sometimes I wonder why am working , to earn money - to get financial security blah blah.... rediculus. Yes for me this is the most absurd thinking. We want money for satisfying our selfishness.I want to change that.